Hey everyone, it’s me again! Time for a new instalment of bloggy goodness. well….maybe
Since completing the prop bet weeks ago now, I have really struggled to get back to the tables, I have been away a lot and other than that I have been not feeling great mentally.
Those of you that are regulars to my blog on WordPress or the older version on Pokerstrategy.com (search my username for link to old blog) will know I have a rather torrid relationship with alcohol and partying in general. I wrote a post last year called “Slippery Slopes” which talked about this, and how easily I can go from feeling great and motivated and focused about life, having a bit of a heavy weekend then slipping back into bad old habits.
This month has been less of a slippery slope and more of a terminal velocity freefall with no parachute. It all started innocently enough to be honest, after I finished the prop bet I shot off for 8 days for a job. After this I thought “Hey I’ve been working really hard these last few weeks and not going out much, I think i deserve a couple of nights out” Which is fair enough, unfortunately it just spiralled downwards, a few nights out, ruined 1 week, then I was away for weekend with some mates, ruined another week, too many beers at a home game, another day or so gone, popping out for “a couple of pints” ends leaving me feeling ropey for a day or so, more days gone, I’m sure you get the picture.
When I did get around to playing, it was awful, playing some of the worst poker combined with moving up stakes to the $15s has been really painful. I’m not gonna bore everyone with tales of variance and run bad. It’s just been lol bad, and a lot of it’s mainly my fault.
I have decided, as I did a few months back, to get back on the wagon with the drink, as I cannot and do not want to keep this cycle going, and when looking at things objectively, alcohol is probably the single largest thing stopping me from achieving all the goals I have set for this year. This isn’t just poker either, I have missed bits of work and other responsibilities and it’s really not good!
It hasn’t been all doom and gloom though, I have kindly been offered a stake for the ISPT event which is a 300E buyin, starting online for Day 1, then Day 2 onwards being played live at Wembley Stadium, so that’s quite cool! I have also been getting back into playing chess with some friends, watching tutorial vids on youtube and even bought a couple of chess books. I still suck really bad, but it’s good for the old grey matter. Anyone that plays on chess.com feel free to add me and have a game sometime. (nick: bristolbasher)
Down to the nitty gritty facts and figures from the month so far though, as I’m sure that’s all a lot of you care about.
Games played: 588
I did cash in $250 worth of bonuses and make a small withdrawal, so I guess it’s not uber bad financially. But as I always say it’s not about the $ in the short term, my volume of games and motivation and mental state are what really gets me down. Which is part of the larger problem I guess, the less I do, the more I beat myself up and the less I want to do, and round and round it goes!
So it now seems that I have ended up in a similar spot to last month with regards to VPPs and volume…. this should have never happened playing the $15s as I need 50% less volume to achieve the same amount of VPPs, but with my low volume and awful results, I am now forced to move back to playing mostly $7s again and need to clear 4,376 VPPs in the next 7 days (by the 31st) which works out to about 218 $7sngs/day. So here we go again, hopefully I can get my arse in gear and keep my head clear and get down to business.
Goals for Next Week:
Play everyday+Review session everyday
Keep Platinum star by clearing 4,376 VPPs
No drink/cigarettes (I only really smoke when I drink)
Thanks for stopping by guys, hopefully this hasn’t been too depressing a read for you all! I will come out the other side bigger better and stronger, and hopefully manage to stop repeating this cycle every few months!
p.s. If anyone sees me drunk you have my permission to come bitch slap me